A woman's choice
Much as we talk about women's empowerment, how much is the Indian woman really empowered? Does employment and climbing the corporate ladder mean empowerment? Or is it about the freedom to make choices on your own? Without the load of expectations and implied role non-fulfilment?
I feel an employed woman is under more pressure in India. Not only does she bear the guilt of neglecting her house and family, she also has to cater to unreasonable demands of caregivers or retainers. Then her husband and children keep making demands on the little time she has at home. So where is her me-time? Does she get to do what she really wants, what she enjoys? And here, I am talking about the average middle-class working woman, not the high-flying corporate big-shot. It is double bondage for her - at work, everyone expects her to prove herself, and at home she has to prove her commitment.
The clerical grade of banks, insurance companies and big corporates are filled with such women, who often refuse promotions and transfers in order to be with their families. They are happy to do their 9-5 routine and ruch back home to relieve their mother/in-laws who look after the kids all day. Then starts their home employment: cooking, cleaning, attending to kids' homework, and thousands of other small tasks which a stay-at-home mom has all day to do.
I am not suggesting that these women should give up their little freedom and become housewives. For only a stay-at-home woman knows the utter frustration and meaninglessness of empty days stretching ahead. But India should build a better support system for its vast working women population, so that the pressure of looking after kids does not fall on our elderly people. And the working ladies are relieved of their burden of guilt and expectations.
Creches and day-care centres need to come up in small cities all over India, and provide quality and affordable care for children of such working moms. Genuine care-givers should be employed in such centres, maybe housewives who have a little time on their hands, not just workers who are there for the pay. The last thing a woman wants is sub-standard care for her children.
And needless to say, families should take pride in the fact that the mother is contributing her bit towards the household kitty. Its a matter of changing attitudes, and lending her some consideration and help. She really needs it.
At the end of the day, she should have complete freedom to remain in or give up her job. No one should dictate to her that she "has" to do something. Just as no one "tells" a man to do something.
I feel an employed woman is under more pressure in India. Not only does she bear the guilt of neglecting her house and family, she also has to cater to unreasonable demands of caregivers or retainers. Then her husband and children keep making demands on the little time she has at home. So where is her me-time? Does she get to do what she really wants, what she enjoys? And here, I am talking about the average middle-class working woman, not the high-flying corporate big-shot. It is double bondage for her - at work, everyone expects her to prove herself, and at home she has to prove her commitment.
The clerical grade of banks, insurance companies and big corporates are filled with such women, who often refuse promotions and transfers in order to be with their families. They are happy to do their 9-5 routine and ruch back home to relieve their mother/in-laws who look after the kids all day. Then starts their home employment: cooking, cleaning, attending to kids' homework, and thousands of other small tasks which a stay-at-home mom has all day to do.
I am not suggesting that these women should give up their little freedom and become housewives. For only a stay-at-home woman knows the utter frustration and meaninglessness of empty days stretching ahead. But India should build a better support system for its vast working women population, so that the pressure of looking after kids does not fall on our elderly people. And the working ladies are relieved of their burden of guilt and expectations.
Creches and day-care centres need to come up in small cities all over India, and provide quality and affordable care for children of such working moms. Genuine care-givers should be employed in such centres, maybe housewives who have a little time on their hands, not just workers who are there for the pay. The last thing a woman wants is sub-standard care for her children.
And needless to say, families should take pride in the fact that the mother is contributing her bit towards the household kitty. Its a matter of changing attitudes, and lending her some consideration and help. She really needs it.
At the end of the day, she should have complete freedom to remain in or give up her job. No one should dictate to her that she "has" to do something. Just as no one "tells" a man to do something.
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