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Some thoughts

I don't know if this happens with everybody, but there come certain times when I feel I don't really belong in this world. A total disconnect is what I feel. I should have been born about a century back, when things were better suited to my mentality. Maybe its just old age catching up with me....maybe my way of thinking has become outdated.

Like all peevish old people I start finding fault in everything around me. I find people flippant, values eroded and culture eroded. Modern writing appalls me, movies disgust with their content, and the less said about current music the better. Since everything cannot be bad, I am sure the problem is with me. I have become old, and am at the wrong end of the generation gap.

Another feeling is that of total detachment in all relationships, barring the one with my child. I feel alone, and betrayed. No, there is no earth-shattering reason for feeling this way, it is just I have got sick of all relationships. I feel I have given too much and have been shortchanged in the bargain. Yes, I know relationships should be about giving, not expecting, but I am not a saint, thank you. I too have some expectations and I don't like people walking all over me.

But I should not crib. At least my daughter is with me, and loves me like no one else in the world. And in this life, that is what I thank God for.
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