Skip to main content

Emotional toil of festival times

Festivals are happy times, right? Time for merriment, revelry, celebration, enjoying yourself...

Wrong! Studies show festivals call for a steady spike in stress levels. Cortisol shoots up, starting with preparation for festivals, and remains high throughout, in the quest to do everything perfectly, "at least during the festival".

Guess who bears the brunt of this? Yes, its the one who takes emotional labour for everyone she cares for - the woman of the house.

She wants everything to be perfect, so works her ass off tidying and cleaning things. Then she wants her family to be fed well, so spends hours toiling away making delicacies in the kitchen. Rangoli to be painted - there she is with the brush. Festoons to be hung up - she's balancing herself on a stool. Furniture rearranged, flowers put up, puja room decorated? Yes, only one person who signs up for all this.

Then there's the stress of the whole family at home, stepping on each other's toes. She has to appease tempers, soothe fragile egos, keep the home from exploding. Guests come over or you go socializing, its her headache. Buying presents, arranging sweets and food, ensuring everyone is appropriately dressed and smiling at least. 

And with the maid and cook on leave (festival time, remember?) she has to take care of daily meals and cleaning up too. Everyone relaxes - they have worked hard all year; the woman of the house slogs away.

And then the compliments keep coming in. "You stay at home, you don't know a thing about what the roads look like! I'm not going anywhere, please let me rest" "Why are you so obsessed with cleanliness and decor, mom?" "These clothes are so "yesterday" mom! Why didn't you ask me before ordering?" "Why do you keep nagging all day? Chill and let me chill too!" "I am off with my friends, can't stick around at home all day!" 


So, you are left at home, tired and aching, hoping the family is together at least for the festival lunch or dinner, maybe an outing or two, when guests come home. After all the physical and emotional toil, can you enjoy the festivities? 

Ask any woman, and she will tell you - the last time she really enjoyed during a festival was when she was a kid herself. or when she was on a holiday.


#FestiveStress #EmotionalToil #EmotionalLabour #WomenStressing

Comments

  1. Anonymous8 October 2025 at 22:12

    Righly said

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous9 October 2025 at 04:38

    This is so so true. Though i dont do it myself, but i know many women who work too hard to make others enjoy.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Guru Dutt - Legacy of an Overlooked Genius

"Yeh Duniya Agar Mil Bhi Jaae to Kya Hai:" This heartfelt anguish was literally personified by film maker and actor extraordinaire - Guru Dutt, whose birth centenary happens to be tomorrow (July 9).  Maestro or Failed Genius? All his life, he strove to depict his vision, his dreams on celluloid. Yet, even as he strove for success, for renown, he was a bit of a recluse, a black sheep himself. It was as if he wanted to challenge the language of popular cinema by being within the format, from the inside. His women had brains, taxi drivers and masseurs were philosophers, sex workers pined for spiritual ecstasy, and friendships blossomed between unlikely people. Common people on the street spoke wiser logic than academics or high-nosed editors. The topics of the films may seem dated now, but the eternal truths voiced in them remain relevant.   His films were distinctly different from other popular Hindi films. They had all the commercial elements of song, dance, comedy, romanc...
Post a Comment
Read more

All We Imagine as Light- Lyricism on Celluloid

When an Indian film makes it the prestigious Cannes film festival, the world sits up and takes notice! And the lovely ladies swinging on the stage is a recent memory that brings a sense of pride. I had the good fortune to catch this film on screen recently. A review of such work is unnecessary, but still am bursting to say a few words. Right from the scintillating background score, to the events that unfold like pages fluttering in an open book, to the effortless performances, it's a masterpiece all right! The first half romances Mumbai- in the rains, at night, in the bazaars, in dingy rooms, in the local trains. Image source: Wikipedia  The second half shows what light truly is, brilliant sunshine, crashing waves and salty air in a small coastal village in Maharashtra. You can feel the taste of salt, the breeze in your hair and the touch of sand under your feet, the cinematography is so real. Payal Kapadia masters the art of holding back, of showing beauty in the mundane. The hosp...
Post a Comment
Read more

Book review - The Stationery Shop of Tehran

Iranian writer, Marjan Kamali's The Stationery Shop of Tehran is a remarkable and touching book. Like all literature set in countries with a deeply troubled history, this book too revolves around disillusionment, pain and the desperate struggle to live a normal life.  Akin to Khalid Hosseini, Kamali intertwines the political in the personal lives of her protagonists. Class struggle also plays a major role, like education or the lack of it. The story spans over six decades and two continents, starting from 1953 Iran to New England, US in early 2013. Love lost, Lives Shattered Young lovers, Roya and Bahman try to hold on to their love in the face of all pettiness and politics, but the aftermath of trauma runs too deep.  Just as their country plunges into another political upheaval, their lives are shattered and they are thrown apart.  Yet, Kamali makes her story deeply human and optimistic. Her lovers are genuinely good human beings, kind, forgiving and full of empathy. In...
Post a Comment
Read more