Types of Bengalis

There are Bengalis and there are Bengalis. On the day after the Bengali New Year - Poila Boisakh, let me dissect a few for my own enjoyment.

• The "Hocche Bangali": It is a mock title given to those pretenders to the role of the true-blue Bengali, those who are the "probashi" or non-resident Bengali. These guys are distinguished by their propensity to add a "Hocche" to every sentence, a replacement to the Hindi "hai". They are also marked by their affinity towards the places they have lived all their lives in, and the cultures that they have adopted over the Bengali culture. They prefer, horror of horrors, to speak in Hindi at home, call their sons "Beta", and like to eat rotis over rice and fish. Their language is spiked with Hindi words, much to the indignation of their West Bengal home-grown counterparts. They also sometimes go without fish for days, something the average Bengali cannot imagine.

• The "Bheto Banagali": The direct opposite of the "Hocche Bangali", this fellow lives on rice and fish. He will have rice for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Has a tendency to grow a rather comfortable paunch as a result of all this rice eating. Loves sweets like chomchom, lady keni and pantua, the sweeter the better. They think they embody true Bangaliana, and are the preserver of Bengali culture. They will read and quote Tagore, Jibananda Das, and Sunil Gangopadhyay. They are familiar with every angle of Satyajit Ray's films. They throng the Book Fair and all kinds of culture festivals in the city. Characterized by a distinctive snoot and a disdain for all things "obangali".

• The New-Age Bengali: GenY Bengalis like to project themselves as more cosmopolitan, more tolerant of intrusions to their culture. They like their pizza and shawarma as much as their kathi roll. They speak in a kind of mish-mash of English, Hindi and Bengali, with Americanisms thrown in. They consider the earlier generation too back-dated and intolerant. For all their pretensions of being citizens of the global village, they share the essential Bengali trait of snootiness and superior attitude.

• The Hon-Bongs: These are the species of obangalis or non-Bengalis who have adopted Bengali culture and mannerisms as their own. They speak fluent Bangla, can converse with you on Ray, Ghatak and Tagore, and long to eat bhapa ilish and mishti doi. Wherever they live in the world, their hearts beat only for Kolkata, and all things Bengali.

So this was my analysis of Bengalis and Wannabe Bengalis. Want to add anything? You can leave your comments below.